Advice help plz pregnant, 2 kids and hes walked out on me?

Just after some advice about my situation at the moment, my partner has walked out on me i am 6 months pregnant and have 2 sons all our children are his.


He has suddenly said that he doesnt love me anymore and hasnt done for a while, i havent noticed any changes in his actions etc... towards me he still told me he loved me etc.... but he says it was all a show. And has said he is fed up of the arguments that we have had ---- these were silly arguments over asking him to help out more as he didnt do anything to help out at home and didnt work.


We only split up on 6th and he is already seeing someone else.


I love him with all my heart and am completly heartbroken, i have done everything a woman could do for him and have bent over backwards to do everything he wanted etc.......


He has never left me before but has had 2 one night stands during our 9 year relationship.


He is still saying he wants to be friends for our kids etc.... but i cannot see how i can be when he's with someoneAdvice help plz pregnant, 2 kids and hes walked out on me?
He isn't worth your loveAdvice help plz pregnant, 2 kids and hes walked out on me?
Hi there, I have been through something similar at the begining of the year. I have 4 little girls 8. 6. 3 and 2 and I am 27. You will cope fine, it will be hard dont get me wrong but you need to be strong and focus on your kids and your unborn baby aswell as your self!


Maybe your x just needs some space to think about what he wants from life, and relise he's made a mistake!


Look at the positives in your life and work with them, when you feel down etc go and do something with friends/family to take your mind of it!


I hope you feel better soon, take care x
For both of your sakes try to be a friend. I know its hard, but try. Dont smother him dont call him. He might go out and mess around but he will come back. But ask yourself if this is the type of mate that you want.
sounds like he found someone befor he left, i feel for you, good luck..
You need to be strong and think about your kids first. if he's not coming home and it sounds like he's not. Then you need to pull yourself together because you have to take care of yourself for your baby and kids. Do you have a parent that can come and stay? You need to accept that he has left you and praying he will come back won;t help. I think you know yourself that anyone who would beg for someone to come back after they have been badly hurt by them and had their trust broken could not have a mutualy respected relationship. You need to just focus on one day and then one week at a time. Other people will help you - just don;t be afraid to ask for it. But please, please, please don't spend all your time just wishinf for your partner to come back as it might send you in a spiral of depression and that if the last thing your kids will need right now.
Hey there,.... listen lady, I have been in this situation, I dealt with it by saying to myself; ';Time to move on';....It is very hard. I will admit there were times when I cried myself to sleep...but now,...looking back ~ .....Well, I am grateful, he did me a favor ~ I mean, he just did not love me ,...so, I now am a happy vibrant, and independent person who looks back on that 'experience' as a learning curve,..








Good luck %26amp; Take care :)
If you are in TN i can help you.
that is so terrible for u..


it is very selfish of him as he should think of his kids first.. even if he wasnt over the hill in love with u he made a commitment by fathering children with u.. and he should think of them not what is best for him!


i know this isnt what u wanna hear but he has no respect for u and he doesnt deserve u! as hard as it seems now.. if he had stayed in his selfish frame of mind think how horrible it would of been if he really didnt wanna be there! unfortunatly u cant make him love or want u and i know it hurts!


pls speak to ur midwife if u need help.. they will help u get through this.. less stress for u less stress for baby


good luck xxxx and chin up and smile :)
It's not easy being pregnant and having 2 small children. You can get through this. Hanging on to someone who isn't returning the feelings is not only devastating and demeaning, it's not worth the energy you put into it. You deserve a whole lot more than that. I know because I went through what you are going through 20 years ago.





I would start with some mental health counseling and try as best as you can to get on with your life without him in the picture. He is the father of your children, so you will have to deal with him now and again. That's a fact you can't get out of. However; you don't have to be involved with him personally. It seems hard and impossible right now, but it does get easier. It takes small steps at first.





You have 3 children to look out for and to take care of. Do what you have to do to make sure they are happy and healthy. Join a support group. Do activities that make you feel better about you. Make some friends that you can associate with that will help you feel better about yourself.





From personal experience I can tell you that if he has been with others while you were together,and that he had to hide them from you, that he already has someone new...it will never work for you. He has broken a trust factor that in most situations will never be repaired. You cannot make a relationship work where there isn't one.





You are much better off, making a life for you and your children without him being directly involved. I've been where you are and it's as painful as it can possibly be. And I also know from being where you are that you will feel better with time and help. Talking with someone will really help. Being unhappy and depressed will not benefit you or your pregnancy.





And don't be in a rush to get with someone else or finding another daddy...give yourself some time to heal. Know that a man is not a pre-requisit for happiness, for being complete or for being a parent. You are what you make of yourself...not what he brings to the table...that's just icing on the cake.





Things may look hopeless right now, but they really aren't. Things will get better. Enjoy your babies while they are young and still at home. Find the joy in having them in your life. They leave home way too soon and then those moments are gone forever.





Hard as it may be and seem, if you truely love him..don't you want for him those things that really make him happy? I know I want for my ex what makes him happy also. It was obvious we weren't making each other happy and I have found someone with whom I'm more happy than I have ever been. I'm so glad we (the ex and I)didn't stay together, because this is so much better. So why would you want to hang on to someone who obviously isn't interested in your happiness? Love is also about caring that the other is happy too.





And for heavens sake...enjoy the buffet before you commit to another one. If he's not what truely rings your bell...he's not the one either.





Good Luck
I KNOW ITS HARD BUT THE MAN DONT LOVE YOU. MY BEST ADVICE IS: YOU WONT DIE W/O HIM SO GET UP %26amp; GET OVER HIM. YOU HAVE2 KIDS %26amp; ONE ON THE WAY WHO NEED A STRONG MOMMY. GO TO YOUR COUNTIES FAMILY COURT %26amp; FILE FOR CUSTODY OF YOUR KIDS + CHILD SUPPORT. YOU DIDNT MAKE THEM BY YOURSELF YOU SHOULD HAVE TO RAISE THEM BY YOURSELF. HE'S NOT WORTH YOUR TEARS %26amp; DONT SIT NEXT TO THE PHONE WAITING FOR HIM TO CALL...WHILE HE'S OUT WITH SOMEONE ELSE!! BE STRONG FOR YOUR KIDS





If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.


If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.


Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior.


Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.


Stop trying to change yourselves for a relationship that's not meant to


Be.


Slower is better.


Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly


Happy.


If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you


Deserve


Then heck no, you can't ';be friends.'; A friend wouldn't mistreat a


Friend.


Don't settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he


Probably is.


Don't stay because you think ';it will get better.'; You'll be mad at


Yourself


Always have your own set of friends separate from his.


Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you.


If something bothers you, speak up.


Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.


You cannot change a man's behavior. Change comes from within.


Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are...even if he


Has


More education or in a better job. Do not make him into a quasi-god.


He is a man, nothing more nothing less.


Never let a man define who you are.


Never borrow someone else's man.


Oh Lord! If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.


A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.


All men are NOT dogs.


You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is a


Two-way street.


You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute


About


Baggage... Deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship


You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship


Consists


Of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not


Supplementary.


Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.


Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and


You are


Always readily available to him- he takes it for granted.


Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you


Need.


Keep him in your radar but get to know others.


Share this with other ladies..... You'll make someone SMILE, another


RETHINK her choices, and another woman PREPARE.


They say it takes a minute to find a special person, an hour to


Appreciate


Them, a day to love them and an entire lifetime to forget them.











BY THE WAY, THIS WAS WRITTEN BY A MAN, SO TAKE A HINT..............
I know how this feels having been in a similar situation myself a few yhrs ago, its heartbreaking but if he thinks that treating you in this fashion is actually acceptable then you have to ask yourself if he is worthy of your love? I don't think he is. I knwo it will be hard but you have 2 sons and a baby on the way to keep you occupied. My advice is speak to friends and family and get as much support as possible. Speak to him if you can and try to fidn out what went wrong, maybe he was feeling under pressure? make aure he will support you with the kids you have as well as the one you are carrying! best of luck with this, i know it hurts like hell! xxx
That's awful. I feel for you. Well there isn't really anything you can do. You don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you and love you. Let him go as hard as that may be. Take each days as it comes and everyday it's gonna hurt a little bit but eventually over time it's not going to hurt as much. Seek some legal advice about child support and so on. You'll be fine and you're going to need to pull yourself together for your children. And just know that everything is going to be okay and everything is going to be fine. It may seem like a lot happening at one time but remember god doesn't give us more then we can handle at one time. And all of this is just going to make you stronger. Good luck and god bless.
O you poor girl. Im so sorry you are going through such a hard time with the Father of your Children. How sad for him in the heal of the hunt to treat you in this way, you will get over him believe me, and will be glad in time to come. you are only a young girl and will meet another man in time who will Love and respect you and your Children.


He's cheated on you before which indicates how irrasponsable and imature he really is. You dont need someone who treats you and your Children like that. Try to get some Family member to give you some help with the Children and you have a day in bed if you can. Its important that you dont over stress yourself for you, your Children and your precious new Baby on the way.


Start a new life for you and the kids without him. Let him go as he's not worth it. Its important to give him a chance to maintain a proper relationship with the Children though. Its his right to see his Children provided he's treating them well and not saying anything negative about you to them! Be strong and dont let him get to you. You can fall in Love again with another Man in time.


Dont forget he will be the Father of your 3 Children for the rest of life, so you might as well get used to that aspect of things. Tell him he can be friends with his Children, and you dont need him as a friend...because he's not one now when you need his help so much. whoever he's hanging out with now will soon get fed up with him and he'll come running back to you........You really dont need someone who treats you in that selfish way. he will learn his lesson in time....will it be too late for him....guess so.


Keep your head together young Lady and dont let him bring you down, he's not worth it. relax it will be his loss and not yours at the end of the day.





All my love and Best Wishes to you and your little Family and good luck in your new relationship when it happens...and it will!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
take each day as it comes


I'm not going to say the pain will go away


you will always carry it inside you .


but it will, one day not hurt so much.


the best way you can get back at him is to live life.


be the best mum you can be .


be a strong woman a role model for your children
What a poor, miserable excuse of a 'man.' What a selfish SOB. You are 6 months pregnant FGS why should he not help you out especially when you have 2 other children too. I know it's hard for you hun but you really are worth more than this. Do you have any family supports at hand ? This man is rotten to the core but you will survive this believe me. Even a friend would not treat you like this, so you need to be strong. He will never change and I think you need to make plans for the future without him in your life. It will not be easy but you have to think about yourself and your children. I hope you have family around you who will support you. I wish you all the luck in the world. xx
TRY %26amp; get on ur feet again!%26amp; remember the child you're still carrying!think with your head....you have 2other children that needs your attention too.....you have a lot of love to ive...so give it to ur kids....


he might be feeling tight in d relation with the 3rd child on the way %26amp; might have missed his freedom!!!!!


DONT try %26amp; get him back as this will push him further away from you!! let him go...%26amp; get on with your life...he'll soon realise what he lost %26amp; he'll come back to you....


i sincerely wish u all the luck....
I'd say that you're on your own. You can force people to do a lot of things, but love isn't one of them. If he has fallen out of love with you (or never was), then there's nothing to do but accept it and try to move on.


I would advise trying to stay by some family temporarily (please do not stay more than you have to as this can sour relationships) just to get your bearings and for emotional and financial support.


It has been 2 weeks...I would say give it another week or so - if nothing happens, then see a counsellor or relationship coach/psychologist. Join a couple of groups (online or in your area) and hear their stories. Then decide your course of action.


I would strongly urge you to take him to court and get him to support you financially. It is difficult raising 3 kids on 2 incomes, let alone 1.


And whatever happens, try not to bring your kids into the battle...don't make them casualties of the rift between you and your husband!


Good luck, and my heart goes out to you!
hey there im going through the same sort of thing but im the bloke she kicked me out sayn she didnt love me no more we have three kids an she moved her new chap straight in which was gut wrenching to say the least, but anyway it sounds to me like hes bin wiv this other bird for a while! i know its easier said than done but keep your chin up honey you will be alright an if he really wants to stay friends for the kids sakes then he must understand that it will only confuse them if he tries to push this other girl in yours and your babbies faces if he cant understand that then he aint worth the worry! seriously though i hope everything turns out good for you an your babbies as i said i sort of know how you feel in a roles reversed way but trust me things will get better i promise ;-)
just go on wit ur life
That is awful,I'm really sorry for you and the kids.You need to seek legal advice,so you can support yourself and the kids.If he cheated on you during your relationship than he probably had the girlfriend already.He is not worth fretting over,you are better than that.Take it from someone who was in that kind of siuation.Think about yourself and the kids now and move on.,It will get better,but will take time.Get a lawyer soon.
Best way to find the right person is to BE the right person. If you've been with the same guy since you were 15 then you need to see what else is out there. Keep your head up and do the best you can for the kids. If that guy doesn't realize that you're valuable then somebody else will.
Hi there i know exactly how you are feeling as ive been throug the same thing myself.. that was over 22 years ago, yes it is hard to cope at first but have faith and take it one day at a time your going through a really rough time right now and are as you say feeling very fragile but i came through it and went on to remarry and have another child too so in the end i bought up 4 children theyare all grown up now and if i can do it i know you can too just believe in yourself and trust in yourself and it will take you a long way to feeling better and more confident about coping with what the future has to offer you


so good luck it really is worth it hang in there
I think what you need right now is to stop focusing on him. Try to move on with your life as gracefully as you can. Get some out side support. Go to your family, Find a church that you feel comfortable in, or a program for single mothers. If he still wants to see the kids you can work out an arrangement but in no way let your self get hung up on this situation. You deserve a man that loves and respects you, something you haven't been getting in this past relationship. As for your pregnancy, if you feel that there is no way you can raise this baby with or with out help you can do the hard thing and give it up for adoption. If you decided to raise the child then my advice to you is to pour out all the love you had for this man on your baby and forget about him.
I learnt after being with a guy for 5 years and three kids later that guys like that are just not worth it,the first weeks are going to be so hard for you but you will get through it,with time you will sit and wounder what you saw in him in the first place ,it just takes a great deal of time to get there.


good luck